Monday, November 17, 2008
I decided to put a few pictures up. The first one is of Ainsley, she is enjoying her after school snack of popcorn. The second is of Renah and while it is hard to see, she is wearing those gross "Bubba teeth." She got some the other day and loves them. The last is a picture I decided to work on. When Wade and I first came home from the doctor's office, Wade took the ultrasound pictures and put them away so I wouldn't have to look at them for awhile. The other day I told him I wanted them back out. He said h only put them up until I was ready to have them out. I wasn't sure how ready I was but when I looked around the living room and saw pictures of my girls I needed a picture of my son. The cross is something the nurses put with him for the pictures they took of him. And while I do have those pictures of him after I delievered, I needed these put up. I found some scrapbooking stickers for the letters and put the meaning of his name on the frame. Some may think it is a little morbid, but it helps me and I feel is a good reminder.
So this weekend I got the reminder that women get that they are not pregnant. I had and have mixed feelings. Part of me was a little glad because it means we can start thinking of another child and another part knows I shouldn't be thinking about getting pregnant right now because I should be pregnant. But I am not and nothing I can do will bring back that pregnancy. I am not trying to replace my son nor do I think by getting pregnant I will feel better. God knows the right timing for me though.
We had a good weekend. Friday noght was the harvest festival at Ainsley's school. I won a gift certificate to a little shop downtown and found a few things this afternoon. Saturday, Wade and I went to Gatlinburg. We had about an hour and a half total to shop and we saw "The Miracle", it is a musical about the birth, life, death and resurrection of Jesus. It was really good. It was a nice day for Wade and I. Some time together we needed. Well, I thank you if you read. I know I tend to ramble. Mostly, this is my therapy, it helps me to write about what has happened. But I do enjoy the writing. i hope you have a great afternoon.