Struggles

It's hard when a friend does something to you that you know as a friend you wouldn't have done to them. The last several months I have been struggling with this. Forgiveness is a daily chore at times and while the forgiveness is tough I think not letting bitterness take residence in your heart is more difficult. As a Christian I know how important forgiveness is to my walk with Him. But if forgiveness meant we could forget the wrongs done against us, that would be wonderful. As humans it is out natural desire to want to hurt someone the way they have hurt us, but Jesus tells us that vengeance belongs to Him not us. Are we afraid that He really won't defend us? I'm struggling with this at the moment, I want to let Jesus handle this situation but at the same time I want the ones who has hurt me so deeply to understand how they have hurt me. I don't want to hurt them in the same way because I wouldn't knowingly do that to someone I call friend but I wish they could feel the pain I am feeling and blow this has given to every aspect of my life. I know I will grow stronger out of this but I don't want to also grow more jaded about friends.